Jan 10 A Day to Explore and Relax

Today I got up later than normal and went on a tour with the other volunteers. We saw the Lotus Temple which is amazing, but we couldnt go in. Then we went to Humayan's Tomb which is breathtaking! It is a tomb of Mughal architecture which the Taj Mahal was inspired by. Its not the Taj Mahal but it is still absolutely incredible! When we first got there I spent lots of time taking picutres and exploring, to realize that the area I had been exploring was only section. The Main part was further away and even more amazing, which I did not think could be possible. The architecture is just so different from anything I have ever seen before. Its unlike anything in the U.S., but also unlike anything I saw when I was in Europe. Totally unique to this part of the world. It is far older than the country I live in! Seeing something that ancient and magnificient made me realize the truth of what Dr. Aswini has told us when he spoke. He talked about how India was an ancient and continuous society, making it more complex and set in its ways than a nation like the U.S.

Afterward we had lunch at a nice restaurant and then came back to the base to watch a movie and rest. It has been a very long week for me and it was so nice to take it easy. The doctor ordered me to take it easy for a few days. I have made a list of my priorities for this week concerning my research. I plan to focus on meeting with my contacts. I am going to speak with several fo the CCS staff members, the head of the NGO I work with, as well as the 2 people I met, Daniel Lala and Professor Aswini. I have some sense of hwo to research, but speaking to several people who are knowledgable about NGOs in general and in specific ones will help me to direct my research. I believe that talking with several people first will help me to focus in on my topic. I want to see how NGOs work in India; the roles they play in society and whether or not those roles would be filled without these organizations. I am interested to see how broad the scope of NGO work is and what types of people they target. I have made lists of questions and discussion topics for each person I wish to talk with so that I will be prepared. As I meet with these people I will post summaries of my findings. Today was a good day for getting oraganized for the week.

Jan 9- Moving On

Yesterday I typed a blog from the hospital in a word document. I wrote that blog around 1 pm but the story was not over. I did not leave the hosptial until after 7 pm. The hopsital i was in was totally disorganized! I was told I would have to stay another night though I felt fine and then told I could leave back and forth over and over again. It was weighing on my emotions. I wanted to leave so badly! I was finally discharged at 3:20, yet it still took hours for them to let me go. I felt much better, yet still miserable because I was alone in the hospital and couldn't talk much to my family. Plus they kept giving me tests, making me nervous that something serious was wrong. I had an ultrasound among other things. Now I am on 5 medications and a strict, bland diet. I am taking it easy.

Today I slept in and then rested until lunch. Before lunch I was trying very hard to re-transition back to being here, but I really just wanted to go home. I was a bit upset. I knowl that I would very much regret leaving India when I worked so hard to get here, but its a difficult place to live. I woke up after not having showered for days, eager to finally shower and had NO hot water! I took a cold shower with only a drip for water pressure. After lunch got better though. I went out with the group of Australians because all of the other volunteers went to the Taj Mahal today. We went to a HUGE shopping mall called City Walk. It was bigger and nicer than any mall I've seen in the U.S. It had expensive, nice Western stores with only a few Indian shops. It was four stories in some places. I have only seen the impoverished and dirty side of India so it was different and interesting to see this. Most of the peopl here were wearing Western-style clothes, mostly jeans. These were clearly the wealthier people. Many designer labels were here; there was even a Nike store and all prices were the same as they would be in the U.S. just transferred to rupees.

Afterward we went to a sitar and violin concert. It was very different. The woman played the violin by resting the end of it on her foot on the floor (she was sitting on the stage) which is totally different than how it is played in most of hte world. Plus the sound was very different. I will post a video of it when I can. Both were very talented musicians, but the music was not the type I would listen to very often. The concert was a whole experience. There was incense and we sat on cushions on the floor. There were mostly Westerners at the concert and the Indians there were wealthy.

The interesting part of the trip was that I had my first ride in an auto-rickshaw! They are tiny, three-wheeled taxis that are prevalent all over the city. They drive pretty crazy. I have seen them all over but never thought I'd actually ride in one. The drivers are difficult to negotiate with. You have to be very harsh to negotiate a price otherwise they will take advantage of you. Our driver was very aggressive! He kept driving off the road. Traffic here is a huge mess. There are no rules, essentially cars just fill in the space along with people, motorcycles, carts and many other vehicles and people. The auto-rickshaw has no doors so I was crammed in the back with 2 other girls without a door. It was certainly an experience!

After being out for a while I felt more encouraged. I know that I can stay here for two more weeks. I sent out emails today to the professor I met and the Canadian man. I will meet with both early next week. I have also talked to the assistant program manager who I will interview and who will schedule a meeting for me to meet with the head of my NGO soon. Now that I have had a week to get used to things, my goal for this next week is to dive into my project by speaking with as many sources as possible to gather information.

Jan 8- Well I Got To See An Indian Hospital...

I did not write a blog for yesterday because I have been in the hospital. At 2 am on Thursday I started throwing up and I felt terrible. I threw up 8 times before I could see the doctor in the morning. The doctor gave me an injection to stop the vomiting and some medicine. I took the medicine but couldn’t get down much food or water. I felt terrible; completely achy, both hot and cold in waves, stomach pains and just totally miserable. When I tried to eat or drink, I only felt worse. I called the office crying so the program director came and told me I should go back to the doctor and to take some stuff because I may need to stay overnight. I had gotten so dehydrated that I needed an IV because I couldn’t drink anything. I was taken in an ambulance to the hospital where I had to wait for hours for a room to become available. I was hooked up to an IV for hours while I waited in a hallway, lying on a rolling bed. Luckily the doctor here could get the needle in a vein because at the doctor’s office they tried and failed 4 times which was unbelievably painful. I screamed on the fourth one it was the worst pain I have ever felt. Finally I got a room to myself which is nice, but I’m still here and I so badly want to leave! It is 1:00 pm the next day.


I stayed overnight at an Indian hospital hooked to an IV surrounded by doctors and nurses speaking Hindi. This has been the worst 2 days of my life so far. A member of the staff stayed with me all day yesterday until about 8:30 pm, a little while after I got my room. Then I was alone. If nothing else I guess I can say this has made me remember how wonderful my family is! I really miss them and I am thankful that usually they are so close to help me out. Throughout this whole experience from the vomiting in my bathroom to the doctor’s office and then the hospital all I wished was that my parents or Landon was with me. Today they told me that I would have to stay another night and I began to cry, I was trying so hard to be brave and strong, but now I feel totally okay and just want to leave this hospital! I am so bored and just sick of being here. Plus I feel totally okay. I know the doctor wants to just make sure I’m fine, but nothing is worse than being in a hospital alone thousands of miles away from home! Also, the doctors haven’t been telling me much, yet I had to get an ultrasound today. I feel clueless and frustrated.

Just now though, my nurse came back and said I will be discharged soon. I hope that’s true! I’ve been demanding to speak with my doctor for hours and she hasn’t come yet, but that message did just come. Hopefully it wont be long now. I never thought I’d be so happy to get back to my apartment here, but I cannot wait to get back and shower!

I regret to say that this has made me miss 2 days of work with my NGO. Also I had planned to go to Agra to see the Taj Mahal tomorrow, but now I am not sure I’ll be able to go. It’s a 4 hour car ride there and then we’d be walking a bit I think so I probably can’t go. This weekend I’ll have to make a new plan for my research to make sure I get it all done in these next 2 weeks. I am excited about the leads I have here so I expect to uncover some useful information.

Jan 6- A Difficult Day

Today has been a long rollercoaster. I am writing around 630 pm on wed while many of you in the US are just getting up or are still sleeping. Wednesday is just starting for you (8 am). I slept for the first time a full night’s sleep which is good because today was eventful!


I have moments here where I am shocked beyond belief and I just can’t understand what’s going on around me and other moments where this just feels like another place. The normalness of the way things are here is striking. I’ve seen lots of pictures of poverty and the “less fortunate” but that cannot prepare you for what it is like to experience India. Unlike those pictures the people here are not desolate and sad-looking. They do not sit around with big sad eyes feeling hopeless. Things are definitely different here. People do sleep beside the streets in tents, children do walk around without shoes, and in some places conditions are unbearable and terrible, but here the people go about their normal routine. They do not find these things odd. It seems that many have at least the basic necessities, but even many of those who don’t go about their life and get by. This is life for them. The normalcy is what is most striking to me. From birth they see these things and do not find them odd.

Today I had a moment on the way to work where I had to bite my lip to keep from crying. Even now my eyes are watering. Two precious children came up beside our car while we were stuck in traffic. They were standing in the very small space between the cars and the thin median of the highway. A little girl with pigtails, a dirty face and clothing, and a beautiful smile came up to the window. She giggled and smiled like she was doing the most fun thing ever. Her brother, also very cute, had a green hat with a string that had an object at the end. He had a mustache and eyebrows drawn on his face and he bobbed his head to make the object on the string spin like a helicopter blade. We (a car full of girls) awed at how cute and innocent they were. Then they began to beg for money, knocking on our windows with their tiny hands. That’s when I almost started crying. I had to ignore the soft knocking. The CCS staff told us not to give any money. When children beg for money its almost always for criminal activity. People will kidnap children and force or pay them to beg for them. After this we turned into one of the sites of Mobile Creches to drop off some volunteers and I saw a little boy standing in the middle of the mud and construction materials barefoot, chewing on a burlap bag. No parent in sight. There were other barefooted children walking to the NGO shack where my fellow volunteers would be working. I can’t explain to you how they looked. Wow. I got to my own site where the dirty children were so excited to see that I had returned.

Today was a bit intimidating. I just cannot understand the women in charge because they know no English and I feel so helpless when they talk to me. Tomorrow Jackie and I have to plan our own lesson but I’m afraid it wont go well. These children do not listen! They are wild. I am with 3 to 5 year olds and when I tell them to “Ek, Do, Teen, Leekho” (“write 1, 2, 3”) on their blackboards like the teacher instructed me to do they just draw all over it or erase the numbers I have written. Then they shout “Didi, Didi!” which is what they call me and proudly show me their work hoping to see a look of approval at their masterpiece. I shouldn’t approve of their disobedience but they are so eager for approval that I cannot help but smile and nod my head. They run crazy and shout in Hindi. I have already said “Bat Jao” and “mat maro” (“sit down” and “don’t hit”) numerous times!

This afternoon after lunch I came back to my room feeling homesick for the first time. I lay on my bed wishing I was back at Wofford taking an interim class on campus like usual with my friends. I have only been staying at my volunteer site for 2 hours so I felt like I am not helping much. I wished I had a room with central heating and a nice shower. I felt discouraged so I kept telling myself that I am only here 3 weeks so I can’t let discouragement get in the way of this adventure. I’ve paid so much to get here I have to make the most of it. For several years now I have said over and over again that I want to work with the people who are most in need in the places where there is the most suffering. I have told countless people that I am passionate about working with people in need and that one day I want to work overseas in a place like India. Now I am here doing what I’ve dreamt of being able to do for so long. Despite my permanent headache and the inconveniences of living here I have to remember that this isn’t about me.

Also, after our Hindi lesson we had another guest speaker who may be a good resource for my project. An Indian man lectured us about Indian history and culture. Most people were bored but I was fascinated! I enjoyed the entire hour and a half! He taught international politics which is my concentration at Wofford. Professor Aswini Ray who is now retired was an interesting man who noted many of the paradoxical elements of India. He emphasized that it is a continuous, long-standing civilization (unlike that of the “immigrated societies” of the US and much of the world) which has deeply embedded historical memories and traditions. It is not easy for change to take place in a society like this. There are many things here which do not seem rational but these come from logical sources which are slow to be changed. Today there is a very interesting mix of traditional and modern elements. He advised us not to dismiss the unfamiliar as irrational.

He told us that India has been rated as one of the most corrupt governments in the world. The politicians and democracy are criminalized and decaying. As a consequence violence is rising. Still, he held out hope for democracy, noting that civil society has become vibrant and enormous, playing an important role that the government cannot fill. There are powerful movem.ents such as the women’s movement, and movements of disadvantaged people like the Dalits (untouchables). NGOs play an important role by providing services that the state does not and cannot provide.

Listening to him speak got me more excited about my project and started giving me more ideas. For some reason it was encouraging for me. I feel much better now than I did this afternoon. I’m sitting with two of my American friends, Heather and Jake, writing our blogs together. They are pretty cool.

This is my room which i share with 2 Australian girls:

This is my shower:

Jan 5

India is a fascinating place. It has an interesting mix of traditional and modern as well as Eastern and Western. Women wear bright colored cloths but there are so many all wearing the same things that it all blends together. Many women wear traditional clothes with Western-style cardigans, jackets, tennis shoes and other accessories. There are also some who actually wear jeans and blouses but they are fewer. Men wear mostly Western-style clothing, usually slacks and sweaters or button up shirts, which they have somehow succeeded in making look Indian. The clothes are a mix of old and new, as well as the vehicles. Everything from carts drawn by animals, auto-rickshaws, cars, bicycles and mopeds fill the streets while pedestrians also walk through the roads, dangerously close to getting hit. There are no traffic laws. Most of the roads literally have no lines and vehicles just fill in the space as they wish. There is no order, no lanes, and this only works because they honk like crazy. This is not offensive but lets other cars and pedestrians know that you are near. There are several drivers for CCS who drive the volunteers around. Today my driver was Sunil and he always makes me car sick! I still have a headache from the hour long ride I took earlier today.
Today was my first official day of work with Mobile Creches. Jackie and I got there, ready to observe and interact with the children. They called us Didi which is how younger people refer to older women in Hindi. The children were so funny. They would speak to us in Hindi and it didn’t seem like they knew that we did not understand. Yesterday we had a Hindi lesson so today we knew some basic phrases. We could tell them things like “bat jaro” and “shamash” which mean “sit down” and “good job!” Because the teachers do not speak English we could not really communicate with them. We just joined the children who sit on the floor around a blue table a few inches off the ground with their blackboard and chalk. I tried to observe what they do so that I can begin to formulate my own ideas for lessons and activities. Surprisingly to me the children sat at the table for most of the time we were there and mostly stayed in their places. I think they sit there for most of the time every day.
Basically it seems like the teachers are mostly day care workers who try to teach some too. They try to get the children to write letters and short words on the blackboards but they mostly draw pictures or scribble. At the end we did an exercise where the teacher would hold up a card with a picture of food and the children would call out what it said. Apparently children love foreigners because they were not at all shy but excited to see us. Most had thick snot running from their noses because the climate is colder than usual here right now and the building has no heating. Their clothes were dirty, but the children are all precious. Their joy and laughter is contagious. I couldn’t stop smiling. What beautiful children! Today we mostly played with them but we will start making plans tomorrow. I am trying to clear my mind of all stereotypes and preconceptions that I have so that I can see clearly. Initially my reaction was a type of shock at the conditions there, but this site is much better than many daycare centers.
In the afternoon a Canadian man who volunteered with CCS years ago and now works in India with a children and women’s empowerment NGO came to speak with us. He told us about what he does and how Vidya helps children and women and it was very inspiring. He has done work with NGOs in several other countries as well so he will be a good resource to talk to. I have already spoken with him about my project and we are setting up a meeting for next week to talk more about his work, and about NGOs in general. He is enthusiastic about chatting with me. He also may have connections to other NGOs in the area that I can get in contact with which do a number of different tasks in New Delhi. It seems that pieces of my project are coming together. There should be lots of access to information about NGOs available to me.

Jan 4

Today was my second day in India but it feels like I have been here a week! I woke up before my alarm again and today the tiredness has really caught up with me. Between all of the pollution and the time difference and the crazy driving (I get car sick easily) I don’t feel really well today. I got up and struggled again to get ready quickly because everything is different. Here we cannot flush toilet paper we have to throw it in the trashcan and my shower is a spicket with low water pressure and there is no curtain which separates it from the rest of the bathroom so showers are cold and difficult. Also, I cannot drink the water here which means I must remember not to brush my teeth in it and I have to use bottled water to wash my hands before putting contacts in too. Everything here seems different, but it is also thrilling to be here in New Delhi.


Today I visited the NGO Mobile Creches which I will be working with. There are 20 volunteers here and we were assigned to NGOs in pairs. There are 3 locations of this organization that CCS works with so the five other volunteers and I who are working with Mobile Creches visited all 3 sites today. First we went to the main headquarters (Raja Bazaar) which is where I will be working and met with the human resources leader who told us about the organization. Essentially they open up centers at construction sites to take care of children from 0-12 years of age between 9am to 5pm because many times parents will both have to work during the day and will bring children along and leave them among the rubble and dirt while they work because they have no place to take them. This organization feeds them and teaches them to improve their cognitive level. Many of the children are neglected or treated poorly so showing love to them is very important.

At the first site I was surprised by the building. There is no heating system and the door was left open though it is very cold outside. It is tradition for Indians to take off their shoes inside so all of the children were barefoot on the cold concrete floor; only a few had socks. They were so precious and happy. We couldn’t understand their Hindi but it was clear that they were very excited to see us. Though we spoke different languages it was still possible to interact. They were so full of energy and excitement it was contagious. It was really just one room with 3 divisions where different age groups were separated. I will be working with children from 3 to 7. My partner Jackie (from CT) and I will have to come up with our own lessons and activities. This is exciting but the difficult part is we have to communicate with the teachers who speak VERY little English! This is truly going to be difficult. Hopefully I can take pictures to post later of the facilities but they advise not to bring a camera at first. The building is one that children would never be kept in, in the US.

The other centers were worse. The second site was further into the city on another construction site and was a very tiny tin shack, maybe 5 feet by 5 feet. Only the two volunteers at that site were allowed in because it was so small so I did not see it. The last one, however, was similar though much bigger. Still tiny by US standards, it is a room with 3 divisions. It has a very dirty floor where sometimes up to 96 children come. It was also a metal shack without heating. The playground is a patch of dirt. The children here looked like they hadn’t been bathed in quite some time and the facilities were not as clean as the first site where I will be working. Though it is not much, it was decorated with artwork from the children which made it bright and cute.

Between this and driving all around the city today I am getting a view of India and I must say at the moment I cannot describe it to you. I can’t formulate into words what I am seeing or what I think about it. I am processing a lot of shock. There are people everywhere. Every foot along the road there are people living, selling, walking, working and doing a number of other things. There are just people everywhere! India has 1/6 of the world’s population and New Delhi, the capital, is a very populated city. It is very loud and very dirty.

Tomorrow I will begin my first official day at work. It will be a day of observation and beginning to get ideas for activities. I am anxious because I do not yet know how to approach this, especially since the children do not know English, but I am also excited. After working a few days to get the gist of how it works I will be meeting with the staff to ask questions for my research. I am in the process of coming up with questions.



**A quick note: I will be very busy here and have unstable internet access plus there is a 10 ½ hour time difference here so do not pay attention to the date on the blog site but at the date at the top of each blog. The date it is posted may not match up with the day in the US. If there is a day where I do not have internet access I will type up my blog on a word document then add it the next day.

Arrival

I have just arrived in New Delhi and wow it is a different world! Last night I arrived at the housing provided by the CCS program around 11pm Delhi time so I went right to sleep after meeting my 2 austrailan roommates. This morning (because of the time difference) I woke up before 6am! Right now it is 7:02 pm here but it is 8:35 in SC so I'm really tired. For my program we had orientation today and I am getting to know my fellow volunteers who are mostly Australian. I spoke with Jaggi (one of the staff members) here about my project and he promised to set me up with my the director of the NGO Mobile Creches which I will be working with. He also can arrange for me to stay at my placement longer so that I can sit in the office with the NGO staff to learn more about what they do and how it works. He is also going to arrange for me a meeting with another NGO. The staff here is very helpful and accomodating. It seems that they will be very helpful with my project.
Mobile Creches is "a non-profit organiztion that provides day care facilities to underpriviledged children in the slums and construction sites of Delhi...The centre caters to the holistic development of the child, which includes nutrition, education and basic helath care facilities and community outreach." (from the CCS description of the NGO in the program) The director, Bella, said that the number of students who come to school increases when foreigners come. She really has emphasized that we can make an impact in our placement even if it doesnt seem like it. There will be a language gap especially with children, but as Bella said this morning, there are other ways to communicate.
I am very excited about being here and to start work. I will actually be expected to create full lesson plans here with another girl named Jackie. Here we do not simply help out someone else, but we are responsible for organizing the activities. The staff will follow our lead. That is intimidating, but also very exciting.
I havent seen too much of the city yet, but I look forward to seeing more of it and speaking to more natives.